Embracing the Unexpected: 5 Steps to Finding Peace When Plans Change

Life has a way of unfolding in ways we never anticipated. Sometimes, it takes a sudden turn, leaving us feeling lost and vulnerable. For those of us who’ve poured our hearts into our passions—whether a creative business, coaching practice, or consultancy—the loss of a beloved career can feel like losing a piece of ourselves. It’s more than just a job. It’s a reflection of our values, our passions, and the impact we’ve longed to make in the world.

I know this because I’ve lived it.

4-5 years ago, I was at the peak of my career, aligned with my purpose, deeply engaged in work that not only fulfilled me but also made a difference. I was part of something bigger—a movement where social impact was at the forefront. I was madly passionate about what I was doing, and I could see the ripple effect of my efforts in the lives of others. Every part of my life seemed to click into place—my work, my income, and how it all fit so beautifully into my life. I had found my ikigai—the sweet spot where my passions, talents, the needs of the world, and financial sustainability all intersected.

But then, out of nowhere, everything changed in an instant.

In what felt like a blink, a switch flipped. Something that had brought me so much joy and fulfillment turned into a nightmare. It unraveled so quickly that, within a few short months, I lost everything I had worked so hard to build. It wasn’t just the loss of a career—it felt like the loss of a core part of my identity.

I lost it all, not just professionally but in ways that touched every aspect of my life. My health, my relationships, my spiritual life, and even my living situation—they all seemed to disintegrate, one after the other. It felt like I was in the eye of a storm, helpless to stop it from wiping everything clean. And yet, in the midst of that chaos, all I could do was hold on to the pieces of myself that I still recognized, hoping they would be enough to rebuild.

The only thing I could focus on was grounding myself, centering my energy. I kept reminding myself that I attract the things in my life—and yet, despite my best efforts, I couldn’t pinpoint a single action or decision that had led to this collapse. It seemed, in every way, that this was meant to happen.

It felt like the universe’s blueprint was all around me, and even though there were many mistakes I made and situations that I could have handled differently, there was a quiet knowing deep inside me: this was necessary.

As heart-wrenching as it was, —and still is, at times— I couldn’t shake the feeling that it was happening for a reason. Despite the pain, somewhere deep within, my soul whispered that this was part of a greater plan, and this wasn’t something I could have stopped with any kind of conscious or physical efforts. It wasn’t just about the mistakes I’d made or the opportunities I might have handled differently. This loss, as devastating as it was, seemed destined—a crucial chapter in a story that was still being written. Though I’m still finding my way back to that place of balance and alignment, I’ve learned to trust the process.

If you, too, are experiencing a profound loss—whether it’s the collapse of a business or the loss of a dream that once anchored your life, here are five steps that may help you find peace, healing, and the strength to move forward.

Step 1: Release Control with Compassion

When everything you love and have worked for seems to slip through your fingers, it’s natural to want to grasp tighter. You may find yourself going over every decision, wondering, What could I have done differently? But the truth is, sometimes life doesn’t follow our plans, no matter how carefully we’ve crafted them. And no matter how many mistakes we could have stopped making, when there’s time for disintegration, it’s time for disintegration and dissolution.. The more we allow, the gentler it is (maybe not easier or less tough, but gentler).

So the first step toward healing is to release the need for control, not with frustration but with compassion for yourself. healing is releasing that need for control, and doing so with compassion for yourself.

You did your best, and in this moment, that’s enough. Let go of what was, with grace. Trust that even though the path ahead isn’t clear right now, there is a greater plan at work. A gentle practice for this is through prayer or meditation

A gentle way to practice this is through prayer or meditation. You might say something like, “Please guide me toward the path that is meant for me. Help me release the need to control and trust that I am being supported in ways I cannot yet understand.” This soft, intentional act of surrender opens the door to healing and new possibilities.

Step 2: Honor What’s Still Blooming in Your Life

Even amidst loss, there are parts of your life that are still thriving. It’s easy to overlook the beauty that remains when you’re grieving what’s been taken away, but this step invites you to shift your focus. Take a moment to honor what’s still blooming in your life.

Maybe it’s a supportive friendship or the simple pleasure of a daily routine that grounds you. Maybe it’s your creativity that continues to shine through in small ways, even when you don’t feel at your best. There are seeds of joy that still exist, waiting to be nurtured.

By turning your attention to what’s thriving, you nourish the energy that will carry you forward. As Dr. Wayne Dyer once said, “Within you is a divine capacity to manifest and attract all that you need or desire.” By honoring what’s already good, you invite more goodness to grow.

Step 3: Trust That Obstacles Are Redirections, Not Endings

When the dream you’ve been building falls apart, it can feel like the end of everything. But what if, instead of seeing it as an ending, you viewed it as a redirection? In my own experience, the obstacles that tore down what I’d built weren’t endings—they were detours, guiding me toward something even more aligned with my soul.

It took time to see this. In the middle of my loss, all I could focus on was the pain. But as I’ve begun to heal, I’ve started to recognize that perhaps this detour is leading me somewhere even better. The universe has a way of rearranging things in ways we can’t predict.

What lessons are being offered to you at this moment? What might this experience be preparing you for? These questions can shift your perspective, helping you see obstacles as opportunities for growth.

Step 4: Ask for Signs and Be Open to Receiving Them

When life feels uncertain, asking for signs from the universe can provide comfort and clarity. Whether you believe in a higher power, universal energy, or your own inner wisdom, asking for guidance is a way to reconnect with the support that is always available to you.

I’ve often asked for signs during moments of doubt. A quiet prayer, like, “Please show me that I’m on the right path,”can be enough to invite reassurance. Be open to how the universe responds—whether it’s a recurring symbol, a meaningful coincidence, or a gentle nudge in a direction you hadn’t considered.

When you stay open, the signs will come. They may not always be what you expect, but they will remind you that you are being held, even when the way forward feels uncertain.

Step 5: Keep Surrendering—And Then Surrender More

Spiritual surrender isn’t something we do once and then move on. It’s a practice, something we come back to again and again. I’ve learned that just when I think I’ve fully surrendered, life asks me to let go even more. And that’s okay. It’s part of the journey.

When we surrender, we open ourselves to being guided by something greater than ourselves. We trust that we don’t have to have all the answers right now. We don’t have to know how things will unfold. Instead, we can focus on taking the next right step, trusting that in time, the bigger picture will reveal itself.

If you find yourself clinging to control, gently remind yourself to surrender once again. Each time you do, you strengthen your faith in the process, and that faith will carry you through the unknown.

The Grief of Losing a Dream

I want to pause here to acknowledge the grief that comes with losing a dream, whether it’s a business, career, or creative project. When we invest our hearts into something, it becomes a part of us. Losing it can feel like losing a piece of who we are.

In my own life, out of everything that happened 4-5 years ago, the biggest loss that hurt me the most was the loss of a business that I hadn’t even built from day one—it felt like losing a child I would have loved to see grow, to be there for all its big and small moments—especially in the early years. It wasn’t just a career I was grieving—it was the life I had envisioned around its future. The version of myself that I had imagined emerging from the highs and lows, successes and failures of that venture was gone. I felt exposed and vulnerable, cracked open by the weight of it all.

The thing is, I never would have imagined, when I first got into it, that I would be mourning that loss so deeply, at a soul level. Somewhere, I still don’t fully understand it—but these days, I wonder about it more from a place of curiosity and love, rather than pain.

This loss, though it still stings on some days, and the grief, while still with me, now travels alongside the new dreams I’m building. It’s never “not there,” but it remains in the background, guiding me, making me braver and less hesitant as I journey through building another venture. The grief hasn’t disappeared, and I don’t think I will ever “get over” it, but I no longer fight it. Instead, I’ve found peace with it. I move with it. Somehow, this experience has made all my upcoming ventures richer.

It has deepened my resilience and strengthened my ability to hold new dreams with gentleness. It reminds me to move forward with grace, trusting that every step is part of a larger story still unfolding. Even though it hasn’t been easy, I’ve learned to honor the lessons that come from this loss and to carry them with me into the next venture I’m building.

If you’ve experienced a similar loss, know that it’s okay to grieve. It’s okay to feel the weight of it, and it’s okay to carry it with you as you move forward. Grief isn’t something to leave behind—it walks with you, reminding you of your strength, your dreams, and your capacity to create again.

Like Jenna kutcher beautifully pens this down:

“Grief isn’t something to be fixed—it’s something that stays, and it shapes you in ways that are sometimes even beautiful. 

It deepens your empathy, strengthens your resilience, and shows you that you’re capable of holding both heartache and hope.

We don’t just sit and wait for it to leave us. We take it with us, because that’s how we keep moving forward.”

Conclusion: Trust the Path Ahead

When life throws unexpected changes your way and your dreams seem to crumble, it’s easy to feel lost. But what if, instead of resisting, you allowed yourself to flow with those changes? What if you trusted that each detour is guiding you toward something even more aligned with your true purpose?

As you walk this path, be gentle with yourself. Take it one step at a time. Celebrate what’s still blooming, ask for signs, and surrender—over and over again. You are not alone in this journey, and in time, you will find your way back to a place of peace, purpose, and joy.